The ideal space for me to feel concentrated should be comfortable, bright, and quiet. Fortunately, my room meets these qualifications.
First, my room is comfortable. If I open the door of my room, I can see directly a white large bed into my room. This bed occupies half of my room, and desk and piano occupy the other half of my room. Because my room is very small, everything is at staff's end. Therefore I don't need to move to pick up something. This structure makes me feel comfortable.
Second, my room is bright. There are three fluorescent lamp in my room, so it is very bright.
Light is really important thing when I study. The gray light is hard on the eyes. For this reason, I prefer a room with lighting and my room is so bright.
Light is really important thing when I study. The gray light is hard on the eyes. For this reason, I prefer a room with lighting and my room is so bright.
Finally, my room is quiet. Because I have a room to myself, my room is very quiet unless I make a noise.
In sort, my room is comfortable, bright, and quiet. This is just what I want the ideal space to feel concentrated.
Hi Jinmyung,
답글삭제I like my room for ideal studying space too, and I find your two mistakes. One is absence of comma on the next of 'Therefore' in the fifth line, and another one is same thing between 'lighting' and 'and' in the 9th line.
Thanks,
Wonsik
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답글삭제Hello Jinmyung,
답글삭제long time no see~ I enjoyed your reading. Your writing was well organized,concise. So, it was very comfortable to read, and I could really know why your room is a ideal place for you. One thing I felt lacked of was descriptive expressions. As this is a descriptive paragraph, being more detailed about big and small, arrangement of furnitures using space order, or saying about how fluorescent lamp is diplayed would be good, I think. Not only this, but many things could be in more detail, and your writing would be more perfect! Thank you.
Best wishes,
Hye-young.
Hello Jin-myeong,
답글삭제You have the place where you can concentrate just right for you. I can imagine your room. Your room is so nice. Can you play the piano very well? I can’t play the piano well, so I just wonder if you are good at it. I think you are a bright person. Anyway, I think you'd better write ‘Finally’ part a little more detail, and attach pictures of your room. Then it would be so perfect. :) Thank you.
Have a good holiday,
Anna